so this happened last night and i’m still spiraling so bear with me
basically, I'm 15, my family was going to the local fair thing that happens like once a year, they asked if i wanted to come but i said no cuz i had “homework” (i did NOT have homework bro i just wanted to stay home and do what needed to be done if u know what i mean )
so they leave, house is empty, i get comfy. lights off. headphones on. tabs open. i had my lil playlist goin and everything was set. it was some realll specific femboy stuff too like not just regular videos i was 12 pages deep in twitter threads w/ captions like “don’t scroll if you have school tmrw ”
anyways i was DEEP into it like deep in the trenches brain fully goo. i think i had been at it for like an hour? maybe more? no clue. time stopped existing. i was whispering sh*t under my breath too like “yes please” and “good boy” (IK I KNOW DONT EVEN SAY IT BRO I’M AWARE)
and i had like some moan audios playing in the back too synced up with my d*ldo . literally the most feral session i’ve ever had
BUT APPARENTLY
my parents came back early. i don’t even know why. i still haven’t asked. but i had my noise canceling headphones on so i didn’t hear the door. didn’t hear them walk in. didn’t hear my dad coming up the stairs.
i only noticed when the door OPENED
and i swear on my life it was like time froze
i yanked my blanket over myself and alt+tabbed SO fast i almost sprained my wrist. but i still had one airpod in and the moans were still playing
my screen had like 12 tabs open. you could SEE one of them was just a full-on femboy cosplay thread with a vid that was 100% still moving in the corner. and my dad just stood there. stared at the screen. then at me. then just backed out slowly like he walked in on a crime scene
i heard my mom downstairs go “was he watching… a boy?” and then silence. complete silence. the kind of silence that makes you reevaluate your entire bloodline
i didn’t leave my room for the rest of the night. i just laid there face down. couldn’t even finish. mood was GONE. soul was GONE
this morning my mom asked if i “needed to talk” and i just said “nope.” my dad still hasn’t said anything. not even a cough. like bro didn’t even tell the dog good morning
i don’t know what they saw. i don’t know if they think i’m gay or possessed or both. all i know is i need to fake my death and move to another country
Vaporeon was NEVER compatible for breeding with humans at all!
Firstly, they are not even in the Human-Like egg group, and most of them are male anyway. Since the 4chan post warped the facts about Vaporeon's biology, I will now clarify this matter. Hydration only works in the rain, and Water Absorb, which has a more dangerous ability that I'll elaborate more on soon, doesn't mean your Vaporeon will turn white after you pull out. I know this because I cleaned sperm bank toilets long ago. Their eel-like skin makes it impossible to grope them too.
Also, what the 4chan post failed to mention is that Vaporeon can control water telepathically, meaning it can create Kyogre-like tsunamis at will, and, thanks to moves like Scald, Hydro Pump, Ice Beam, and Hyper Beam, Vaporeon has many more ways to unalive you. It can also learn Detect and Toxic too, so don't explore that "deep sea cave" for "treasure." Vaporeon can also force the very same water it can control to enter a person's orifice until they explode, as well as being able to enter any human orifice, just like the candiru fish, with it eventually reaching any vital organs in the human body and ensuring those organs rupture thanks to its water-based biology. This allows the Vaporeon to exit the newly created corpse easily.
Now here is the ghastly truth about Water Absorb: since humans are 65% water, if a Vaporeon was inside a human body, it could absorb the water until the human was nothing more than a withered corpse. Oh, and here's a fun fact: if a Vaporeon rematerialized while it was inside your urethra, your wiener would instantly explode. As for the moves that Vaporeon can use to make itself horny, the thing is that the rest of Vaporeon's kin can learn those moves too, with Leafeon, Glaceon, and Umbreon (who has more results on Rule 34 and e621 than Vaporeon) having higher defense stats that would blow Vaporeon out of the water any day of the week. Acid Armor won't even change that.
Can y'all stop hating phonks? Seriously, half the time people trash the genre without even understanding what it is. They hear a distorted bassline or a gritty Memphis sample and immediately write it off as noise. But phonk isn’t just a style—it’s a vibe, a whole culture rooted in underground hip-hop, street racing, and raw emotion. It’s the soundtrack of rebellion, of late nights drifting through neon-lit streets, of headphones blasting while the world fades away. From classic phonk with its lo-fi, eerie aesthetic to drift phonk with its aggressive energy, there's variety and depth if you take a second to actually listen. Artists pour their soul into this music, blending nostalgia, grit, and adrenaline into something that's more than just sound—it's atmosphere. Dismissing it just because it doesn't sound like chart-toppers or your favorite genre is lazy. Music is meant to challenge, to evoke, to make you feel something real, even if it’s dark or chaotic. And phonk does exactly that. So before you keep riding the hate train, maybe dive a little deeper into the scene. Watch a drift montage synced to KSLV Noh or DVRST and feel the momentum. Because let’s be real—you can't hate something you don't know💀.
Have you ever played blox Fruits with your life on the line while having a BUNCH of mangos in your mouth?Well this is called dark mango psychology and with dark mango psychology you realize that the mangos ain just your normal mangos they are dark, hehe and when you eat a mango you realize that the serotonins inside of the mangos go all the way to you brain and then when it enters your brain and reaches the membrane it activates something inside you you start to look at people like seeds seeds waiting to get sprouted seeds waiting to enter your tummy and when that happens you realize that your somewhere deep somewhere very deep somewhere you don't wanna be wanna guess what that is... BLOX FRUITS SECOND SEA
"touch grass" is not an insult towards gamers, rather it is advice for them. When participating in intense periods of gaming, the human hand has a tendency to get sweaty. The sweat causes the hand to become slick, and it b becomes more difficult to retain a grip on the gamers gaming mouse, thus making it more difficult to perform well in intense gaming moments. By touching grass with the gamers hand, the grass will impart a layer of particulate onto the gamers hand, the particulate can be made of a variety of dusts, dirts and other natural matter. This particulate will then act in a similar form to climbers chalk, absorbing the sweat and drying out the gamers hand. With dry hands, the gamer can now perform to their maximum when gaming. This is why when an enemy or teammate tells you to touch grass, they are simply trying to assist you in performing better.
This is probably the worst thing I've ever seen. 100 years from now when I'm dying on a hospital bed and I'm asked what my biggest regret was it will be that I turned on my internet and scrolled through the internet on that fateful day... I will never be able to recover from this. No amount of therapy will save me. No amount of prescription pills will let me recover. I am a shell. This memory is so bad my brain is physically rejecting it and now I have a headache every time I think about it. Why did you post this, thinking it was a good idea? You've permanently ruined my life because of this, I hope you're happy. I hope that one day this gets branded as a war crime and you get hauled off to prison, never to see the light of day again. The fact that you're already not in a psych ward for insanity is so baffling I have lost all faith in every kind of justice system. If you subscribe to any religion, you'd best spend the rest of your time atoning for this ultimate sin. Have a terrible day, I hope this creation of yours haunts you in your dreams.
Ok, hear me out. So it's about this guy named Rick. He's a scientist that turns himself into a pickle. Funniest thing I've seen. In the episode Rick's grandson Morty flips over a talking pickle... And its Rick! It's the funniest thing.
I just huffed all the chemicals under the sink guys help I can smell the colour blue and hear light, also my right nutsack is glowing I don't know what to do
那个wojak meme完全是pogchamp！ 这让我想在3D中想象我的可销售毛绒玩具！ 如果您没有得到该参考，那您就是扮演白痴而不是dankcraft的Acringe normie。
Yet you chose to explain on your own terms without any hint as if no one knew yet stated you had to, how presumptuous of you. I could never associate with such simple minded beings
A girl....? Whoa mama! Hummina hummina hummina bazooooooooing! eyes pop out AROOOOOOOOGA! jaw drops tongue rolls out WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF tongue bursts out of the outh uncontrollably leaking face and everything in reach WURBLWUBRLBWURblrwurblwurlbrwubrlwburlwbruwrlblwublr tiny cupid shoots an arrow through heart Ahhhhhhhhhhh me lady... heart in the shape of a heart starts beating so hard you can see it through shirt ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum milk truck crashes into a bakery store in the background spiling white liquid and dough on the streets BABY WANTS TO FUCK inhales from the gas tank honka honka honka honka masturabtes furiously ohhhh my gooooodd~
Hey buddy! Hey, hey! Don't criticize an online relationship. Have you paid for a significant other's- *burps Have you paid for a significant other's Discord Nitro? I don't think so. Have you even gave a kind "m'lady" some Reddit Gold? Do you even remember popular screenshare app "rabbit"? I think not, move on my man.
Once upon a time
in the great
PENE.
